Curious about Empathy: How Important Is It to You? Do You Have It or Need to Work on It?

“When you start to develop your powers of empathy and imagination, the whole world opens up to you.” - Susan Sarandon, American actress

“We need somebody who's got the heart, the empathy, to recognize what it's like to be a young teenage mom, the empathy to understand what it's like to be poor or African-American or gay or disabled or old - and that's the criterion by which I'll be selecting my judges.” - Barack Obama, American President

I have been reading Daniel Pink’s fascinating “mind altering” book, “A Whole New Mind: Why Right-Brainers Will Rule the Future.” Being more of a right brained person (creative, imaginative, artistic, and a storyteller), I am excited about Pink’s approach.

In his words, “The last few decades have belonged to a certain kind of person with a certain kind of mind – computer programmers who could crank code, lawyers who could craft contracts, MBAs who could crunch numbers. But the keys to the kingdom are changing hands. The future belongs to a very different kind of person with a very different kind of mind – creators and empathizers, pattern recognizers, and meaning makers. These people – artists, inventors, designers, storytellers, caregivers, consolers, big picture thinkers – will now reap society’s richest rewards and share its greatest joys.”

Pink devotes a whole chapter to empathy, listing assessments, learning about facial expressions from Paul Ekman, evesdropping, playing an interactive “whose life?” exercise. He also suggests that we empathize on the job, take an acting class, get mind reading, don’t outsource our empathy, and volunteer.

I didn’t find many quotations using the word “empathy” but the ones I did find were all quite positive in flavor. Let me share a few:

• “There is also a natural and very, very strong empathy with the underdog, with people who have suffered, people who have been pushed around by foreigners in particular, but also by their own people.” - Lakhdar Brahimi, International Public Servant
• “True contentment comes with empathy.” - Tim Finn, New Zealand musician
• “If your emotional abilities aren't in hand, if you don't have self-awareness, if you are not able to manage your distressing emotions, if you can't have empathy and have effective relationships, then no matter how smart you are, you are not going to get very far.” - Daniel Goleman, American author
• “Learning is a result of listening, which in turn leads to even better listening and attentiveness to the other person. In other words, to learn from the child, we must have empathy, and empathy grows as we learn.” - Alice Miller, Swiss psychologist
• “Poets have to be sensitive to their audience, but it does not mean that they censor themselves. I realize my audience is diverse. Some will read with empathy and curiosity while others will take offense.” - John Barton, Canadian poet
• “The discoveries of how we can grow and the insights we need to have really come from the inside out. To have genuine empathy, not as a make-nice tool but as an understanding, is essential to the next step.” - Patricia Sun, American philosopher and communicator
• “The great gift of human beings is that we have the power of empathy.” - Meryl Streep, American actress

And one that should put a smile on your face:

“I have absolutely no empathy for camels. I didn't care for being abused in the Middle East by those horrible, horrible, horrible creatures. They don't like people. It's not at all like the relationship between horses and humans.” - Rachel Weisz, British actress

So, check yourself. How empathic are you? I also suggest reading this refreshing book by Daniel Pink. Let me know what you think.

Curious about the Element: What Is It? Have You Found Yours? Or Has It Found You?

“The Element is the point at which natural talent meets personal passion. When people arrive at the Element, they feel most themselves, most inspired, and achieve at their highest levels.” From: The Element: How Finding Your Passion Changes Everything by Ken Robinson, Ph.D. - one of the world's leading thinkers and speakers on creativity and innovation, Robinson’s The Element is a breakthrough book about talent, passion, and achievement.

I chose this theme because I am in the middle of listening to the audio version of The Element and am completely blown away by the stories that Ken Robinson is sharing.

I have always been distressed to learn that so many people are working and/or living lives that they hate or find distasteful, because they don’t pursue their passions. So many of us have bought into doing what we are expected to do by society. Our parents and teachers mean well and really want the best for us.

Robinson describes the epiphanies that have spurred creatives to pursue what they love with a passion, despite the discouragement and negative reactions of others. Are you doing what you love – often using your natural abilities? I feel that it is never too late or too early to start.

I did not find many quotations that fit “element” the way Robinson defines it, but I did find many worthwhile quotations that I feel are worth reading. Here goes:

• That was a real learning element for me, because I realized that the more true you are to yourself, the more you will lose people.” - Bill Sienkiewicz, American artist
• “The essential element in personal magnetism is a consuming sincerity - an overwhelming faith in the importance of the work one has to do.” - Bruce Barton, American author
• “No amount of skillful invention can replace the essential element of imagination.” – Edward Hopper, American artist
• “Perseverance is a great element of success. If you only knock long enough and loud enough at the gate, you are sure to wake up somebody.” - Henry Wadsworth Longfellow, American poet
• “Time is the most precious element of human existence. The successful person knows how to put energy into time and how to draw success from time.” - Denis Waitley, American writer
• “Without the element of uncertainty, the bringing off of even, the greatest business triumph would be dull, routine, and eminently unsatisfying.” - J. Paul Getty, American businessman

And, some more for those of you who love quotations and learn from them as much as I do:

• “In theory there is a possibility of perfect happiness: To believe in the indestructible element within one, and not to strive towards it.” - Franz Kafka, Austrian poet
• “It is energy - the central element of which is will - that produces the miracle that is enthusiasm in all ages. Everywhere it is what is called force of character and the sustaining power of all great action.” - Samuel Smiles, Scottish author
• “I'm still excited at being at a microphone and talking to listeners. I love that. It's the most basic element of what I do and I still enjoy it very much.” - Bob Edwards, American journalist
• “A creative element is surely present in all great systems, and it does not seem possible that all sympathy or fundamental attitudes of will can be entirely eliminated from any human philosophy.” - Morris Raphael Cohen, Russian philosopher
• “Always in my books, I like to throw that rogue element into a stable situation and then see what happens.” - Jeanette Winterson, British novelist
• “An element of exaggeration clings to the popular judgment: great vices are made greater, great virtues greater also; interesting incidents are made more interesting, softer legends more soft.” - Walter Bagehot, English author

So, what do you think? Robinson has reinforced for me the importance of finding and pursuing our passion – and I do. Hooray!

Curious about Worry: Does Worry Ever Attack You? What Do You Worry About, If You Do?

Definition of Worry: To harass or beset with importunity, or with care an anxiety; to vex; to annoy; to torment; to tease; to fret; to trouble; to plague. To feel or express undue care and anxiety; to manifest disquietude or pain; to be fretful.

“It makes no sense to worry about things you have no control over because there's nothing you can do about them, and why worry about things you do control? The activity of worrying keeps you immobilized.” - Wayne Dyer, American psychologist

I pride myself on not being a worrier. When I am teaching my Yoga class, I always urge participants to clear their minds of worries, concerns, and unnecessary thoughts. And, I have always agreed with and practiced what Wayne Dyer states in the above quotation.

But, during this past week, I let worry attack me. On Wednesdays I teach three fitness classes in a row. After the first one, the young man who handles the desk at the club where I was teaching, came in and handed me a note to call the woman who is the regional director for the classes at the present club and another club where I teach. He said that there was some sort of problem with confusion at the other club. Not having time to call between classes – and they don’t allow us to make long distance calls and she is long distance – I waited until after the classes. Then, I got her voice mail.

Even though I know better, I had already started to worry through the second and third classes, and then the rest of the afternoon. Both Bo Bennett and John Lubbock express how I reacted. American businessman Bennett said, “While we are focusing on fear, worry, or hate, it is not possible for us to be experiencing happiness, enthusiasm or love.” And, British statesman Lubbock said, “A day of worry is more exhausting than a week of work.”

When I finally made contact with the director, I discovered that her call was over a minor glitch and we had a delightful conversation. All that worry for nothing! So, I am writing this blog to remind all of us – and me in particular – of the futility of worry.

Let’s share some great quotations:

• “It is not the end of the physical body that should worry us. Rather, our concern must be to live while we're alive - to release our inner selves from the spiritual death that comes with living behind a facade designed to conform to external definitions of who and what we are.” - Elisabeth Kubler-Ross, American psychologist
• “I think the most important thing for an artist is to not worry about what anybody else thinks. You just have to do what comes from your heart and your being and put it out there-that's true in any of the arts.” - Rosanna Arquette, American actress
• “Worry is a useless mulling over of things we cannot change.” - Peace Pilgrim, American activist
• “If you can't sleep, then get up and do something instead of lying there worrying. It's the worry that gets you, not the lack of sleep.” - Dale Carnegie, American writer
• “Success is having to worry about every damn thing in the world, except money.” Johnny Cash, American musician
• “If you ever have the good fortune to create a great advertising campaign, you will soon see another agency steal it. This is irritating, but don't let it worry you; nobody has ever built a brand by imitating somebody else's advertising.” - David Ogilvy, American advertiser

And a couple more to take with you for your upcoming week:

“Do not worry about avoiding temptation. As you grow older it will avoid you.” - Joey Adams, American comedian

“Worry never robs tomorrow of its sorrow, it only saps today of its joy.” - Leo Buscaglia, American author

I learned that we are all susceptible to worry – even when we know it doesn’t do us a bit of good. How does it affect you? And, how often? I would love to hear from you.

Curious about Standards: What Standards Have You Set for Yourself, Your Life, and Your Work?

Definition of Standard: That which is established by authority as a rule for the measure of quantity, extent, value, or quality. That which is established as a rule or model by authority, custom, or general consent; criterion; test. Having a recognized and permanent value.

“You can become an even more excellent person by constantly setting higher and higher standards for yourself and then by doing everything possible to live up to those standards.” - Brian Tracy, American author

I just finished the audio recorded book, “Think Like a Champion – An Informal Education in Business and Life” by Donald J. Trump with Meredith McIver. I have heard and read both complimentary and uncomplimentary statements about Trump, and will admit that I enjoyed and learned a great deal from his approach.

Throughout the book, Trump referred to his “Standard” and sticking to his “Standard.” After hearing his words, I started thinking about the standards that were stressed for me by my parents, teachers, and the environments in which I grew up and still live by.

I feel that we all set our own standards – hopefully high - and that it is not always a smooth life and road when we stick with them. However, when we are firm about them, we will find that our outcomes, relationships, and reputation will thrive. I know that after finishing the book, I do have a high opinion of Donald Trump and what he has accomplished.

I have a new daily journal now for recording goals, a list of what I am grateful for, and I am using it to also list my standards and the “higher and higher standards” that Brian Tracy is suggesting that we set for ourselves.

I also found some excellent quotations about standards, so let me share them with you:

• “The quality of a leader is reflected in the standards they set for themselves.” - Ray Kroc, American businessman


• “When you're around someone good, your own standards are raised.” - Ritchie Blackmore, English musician


• “Let us be about setting high standards for life, love, creativity, and wisdom. If our expectations in these areas are low, we are not likely to experience wellness. Setting high standards makes every day and every decade worth looking forward to.” - Greg Anderson, American athlete


• “What matters is that you are doing what you think is right based on the standards which you hold.” - Walter Annenberg, American businessman


• “We have to set our own agenda, we have to set our own standards, we have to be very strong about what we want, we have to be very strong about our passion and if it's not right for you, you shouldn't do it just because you're advised by so-called geniuses.” - Jackie DeShannon, American musician


• “If there are flaws they are in ourselves, and our task therefore must be one not of redesign but of renewal and reaffirmation, especially of the standards in which all of us believe.” - Elliot Richardson, American lawyer

And, a few more with a bit of a different approach:

• “People mistake their limitations for high standards.” - Jean Toomer, American author


• “Sam Walton was a master storyteller who used illustrative stories to reinforce his cultural standards.” - Michael Bergdahl, American author


• “Soldiers, when committed to a task, can't compromise. It's unrelenting devotion to the standards of duty and courage, absolute loyalty to others, not letting the task go until it's been done.” - John Keegan, English historian


• “It's hard not to play golf that's up to Jack Nicklaus standards when you are Jack Nicklaus.” – Jack Nicklaus, American athlete


• “Standards of beauty are arbitrary. Body shame exists only to the extent that our physiques don't match our own beliefs about how we should look.” - Martha Beck, American author


• “The nicest thing about standards is that there are so many of them to choose from.” – Ken Olsen, American businessman

What are your standards? They rank up there with values and principles. I know that some gurus call them “golden bricks.” Make your list – and add a couple of new ones that are higher than the others.

Curious about Systems: We All Have Systems for Our Lives. What Are Yours? And Are They Working Effectively?

“The way to build a complex system that works is to build it from very simple systems that work.” - Kevin Kelly, American editor

“Man's striving for order, of which art is but one manifestation, derives from a similar universal tendency throughout the organic world; it is also paralleled by, and perhaps derived from, the striving towards the state of simplest structure in physical systems.” - Rudolf Arnheim, German artist

I know that I have written previously about “Systems.” However, I am thinking a lot about them because I just visited my daughter and her husband in Hawaii, where they have created and make use of systems in their successful Hawaiian basket business. The baskets, which sell abundantly, are beautiful and striking with each one being unique.

When I asked my daughter about how they produce and sell so many baskets, she answered immediately with the seven steps they take for each. They have devised the systems that work, starting with collecting the natural ingredients to the final mailing of the baskets to purchasers. She and her husband have the procedure in place, and each knows and fulfills their step and/or steps for which they are responsible. Note that there is overlapping of some of the steps.

This successful organization of systems started me thinking about my “Portfolio Career” – many careers at the same time – and how I do have systems in place for many of the careers and yet not for others.

For example, in teaching my group fitness classes I definitely follow systems and notice that my students enjoy the organization. When it comes to writing, I have systems in place for my e-newsletters, but not so for my e-books which lag behind. I am developing systems for handling social media networking and one-on-one coaching. I also realize that once I develop systems for each of my careers, I become more and more productive in that area.

What about you?

Let’s share some of the great quotations I found:

• “A cardinal principle of Total Quality escapes too many managers: you cannot continuously improve interdependent systems and processes until you progressively perfect interdependent, interpersonal relationships.” - Stephen Covey, American businessman


• “A creative element is surely present in all great systems, and it does not seem possible that all sympathy or fundamental attitudes of will can be entirely eliminated from any human philosophy.” - Morris Raphael Cohen, Russian philosopher


• “All physical systems can be thought of as registering and processing information, and how one wishes to define computation will determine your view of what computation consists of.” - Seth Lloyd, American educator


• “Human beings, viewed as behaving systems, are quite simple. The apparent complexity of our behavior over time is largely a reflection of the complexity of the environment in which we find ourselves.” - Herbert Simon, American scientist


• “Systems are to be appreciated by their general effects, and not by particular exceptions.” - James F. Cooper, American novelist


• “In simple terms, we are aligning our business today with the way we believe future systems are going to be designed, acquired and maintained.” - Phil Condit, American businessman

And a couple more for you to chew upon:

“I believe that our very survival depends upon us becoming better systems thinkers.” - Margaret J. Wheatley, American writer

“In my case, I used the elements of these simple forms - square, cube, line and color - to produce logical systems. Most of these systems were finite; that is, they were complete using all possible variations. This kept them simple.” - Sol LeWitt, American artist

So, how about you? Do you have systems that work for you? We would love to have you share them.

Curious about Ambiguity and Being Ambiguous: Do You Make Use of It? And, How Does It Serve You, Your Life and Your Business?

Definition of Ambiguous: Doubtful or uncertain, particularly in respect to signification; capable of being understood in either of two or more possible senses; equivocal; as, an ambiguous course; an ambiguous expression.

“All knowledge is ambiguous.” - J. S. Habgood, British game developer

Definition of Ambiguity: The quality or state of being ambiguous; doubtfulness or uncertainty, particularly as to the signification of language, arising from its admitting of more than one meaning; an equivocal word or expression.

“The purpose of narrative is to present us with complexity and ambiguity.” - Scott Turow, American novelist

Complexity and ambiguity do go “hand in hand.” I feel that if we examine our lives and our work, especially during our current high speed existence, we will discover that our days are filled with both of them. And yet, years and years ago, Leonardo da Vinci embraced them. One of my favorite books, Michael Gelb's "How to Think Like Leonardo da Vinci," includes a chapter called, "Sfumato: A willingness to embrace ambiguity, paradox and uncertainty."

You will find an excellent article about this, written by Linda Dessau, by clicking HERE

How do you feel about ambiguity? Do you make use of it? I am a storyteller, and often after I have finished telling, listeners will ask, “Was that true?” Rather than disappointing them and, I feel, hurting the story, I will answer rather ambiguously. “What do you think?” or “Every story has some truth.”

As you can imagine, the quotations for ambiguous and ambiguity also provide examples of both. Have fun thinking and chewing on them and their wisdom:

• “I was perceiving myself as good as a man or equal to a man and as powerful and I wanted to look ambiguous because I thought that was a very interesting statement to make through the media. And it certainly did cause quite a few ripples and interest and shock waves.” - Annie Lennox, Scottish musician


• “There is no greater impediment to the advancement of knowledge than the ambiguity of words.” - Thomas Reid, Scottish philosopher


• “I look for ambiguity when I'm writing because life is ambiguous.” - Keith Richards, British musician


• “Take advantage of the ambiguity in the world. Look at something and think what else it might be.” - Roger von Oech, American creativity writer


• “Journalists do not like to report on uncertainties. They would almost rather be wrong than ambiguous.” - Melvin Maddocks, British writer


• “Neurosis is the inability to tolerate ambiguity.” - Sigmund Freud, Austrian psychologist

And, two more for the road:

“I think great art is always ambiguous and can't be pinned down.” - Stephen Rea, Irish actor

“You know, people who almost - yeah, there's a slight reluctance there - but there's also an ambiguity. What are their morals? What is their code of living. What are they really doing here. And it is just interesting because it is never black or white.” - Matt Robinson, American actor

So, how do you feel about being ambiguous and using ambiguity? Don’t hesitate to be and use both in your responses.

Curious about Learn and Learning: How Much Are You Learning? And How Are You Doing It?

Definition of Learning: of Learn; The acquisition of knowledge or skill; as, the learning of languages; the learning of telegraphy. The knowledge or skill received by instruction or study; acquired knowledge or ideas in any branch of science or literature; erudition; literature; science; as, he is a man of great learning.

“Anyone who stops learning is old, whether at twenty or eighty. Anyone who keeps learning stays young. The greatest thing in life is to keep your mind young.” – Henry Ford, American businessman

“By three methods we may learn wisdom: First, by reflection, which is noblest; Second, by imitation, which is easiest; and third by experience, which is the bitterest.” – Confucius, Chinese philosopher

WOW! I chose “Learn and Learning” for this week’s theme, because this past week has been overloaded with learning – “especially by experience which is the bitterest.” If you had asked me three weeks ago for one of the best learning quotations, I would have definitely chosen the above Henry Ford quotation. I have always been a lifetime learner who works constantly at keeping my “mind young.”

However, the past two weeks – and especially this past week – I have been painfully learning and learning and learning some more. You may be now asking, “Why, what happened.”

Two weeks ago to the day, I inadvertently deleted some important files from my computer. When I tried to run the restore feature, it wouldn’t complete it and, even though I tried everything I could think of, it still wouldn’t boot up. For the whole following week, my computer was in the computer hospital being worked upon by a knowledgeable technician.

What did I learn? First of all, that even though I have been backing up files and the whole computer regularly, it doesn’t guarantee freedom from worry. Secondly, even though I feel rather savvy when it comes to computers, I still have a huge amount to learn. And, thirdly, don’t try something too quickly without reading the manual.

I brought my computer home the beginning of this week, and started setting it up on Tuesday. Fortunately, I only lost a few files. But, as the computer doctor told me, I would have to reinstall my programs. This is where the learning really started. I have one more important file to go – phew. I have faced activation challenges because of updates and “error” messages galore. Don’t worry, I am not going to bore you with the gory details.

But, there is always a silver lining! My computer is now working more efficiently and a good deal faster than before. I only am using those programs that are truly important for what I do. So, as I have always believed, everything happens on purpose. Between the learning, the purging and the reinstalling, I feel like I have a brand new computer. Hooray!

Of course, you know that I found some great quotations:

• “The purpose of learning is growth, and our minds, unlike our bodies, can continue growing as we continue to live.” - Mortimer Adler, American philosopher
• “I'm a great believer that any tool that enhances communication has profound effects in terms of how people can learn from each other, and how they can achieve the kind of freedoms that they're interested in.” - Bill Gates, American businessman
• “He who has imagination without learning has wings but no feet.” - Joseph Joubert, French writer
• “An organization's ability to learn, and translate that learning into action rapidly, is the ultimate competitive advantage.” Jack Welch, American businessman
• “A little learning, indeed, may be a dangerous thing, but the want of learning is a calamity to any people.” - Frederick Douglass, American author
• “I never learn anything talking. I only learn things when I ask questions.” - Lou Holtz, American coach
• “Learning too soon our limitations, we never learn our powers.” - Mignon McLaughlin, American journalist

And, three more to learn from:

• “It has taken me years of struggle, hard work and research to learn to make one simple gesture, and I know enough about the art of writing to realize that it would take as many years of concentrated effort to write one simple, beautiful sentence.” - Isadora Duncan, American damcer
• “The secret of success is learning how to use pain and pleasure instead of having pain and pleasure use you. If you do that, you're in control of your life. If you don't, life controls you.” - Tony Robbins, American author and motivator
• “You can learn many things from children. How much patience you have, for instance.” - Franklin P. Jones, American businessman

What have you learned lately? I hope it hasn’t been painful while being a mind enhancer!

Curious about Reach: What Are You Reaching For? How High, Wide, or Low Is Your Reach?

“Stride forward with a firm, steady step knowing with a deep, certain inner knowing that you will reach every goal you set yourselves, that you will achieve every aim .” - Eileen Caddy, English celebrity

I really relate to Eileen Caddy’s quotation. One of my top goals and/or aims has been to reach a wide number of people with whom to form relationships, so that I can help them with their communications, careers and creative ideas. Earlier this year I was involved with an excellent training course in marketing. Our leader suggested that we become involved with Facebook and form a large group of friends.

Eureka! I have been loving every minute of reaching a large and wide group of great people from all over the world. Hence, I chose “Reach” for this week’s theme.

When I started to read and pick the quotations, I found quite a variety of approaches. So many applied to my life and business that I decided to stray a bit from my original idea(s). I also urge you to let yourself consider how your experiences relate to reach and what you are reaching for.

Warning: a change in pace, but still a foundation of reaching.

“There are no mistakes. The events we bring upon ourselves, no matter how unpleasant, are necessary in order to learn what we need to learn; whatever steps we take, they're necessary to reach the places we've chosen to go.” - Richard Bach, American novelist

Richard Bach is speaking directly to me. I have always felt that everything happens for a reason. I have spent this whole last week learning from the “events I brought on myself.” I spend a great deal of time on the computer. And, I also pride myself on being rather savvy when it comes to computers. So, last Sunday I was working on cleaning up my computer’s software when I inadvertently deleted some files I shouldn’t have.

As soon as I realized this, I attempted a restore which left me without my operating system able to boot up. After spending several hours trying everything I could think of, I admitted the machine to the computer hospital and it is still there. (Should be released on Monday). Yes, it has been “unpleasant” and I have learned the importance of taking care of my laptop, having backups (hopefully, the ones I took to the computer hospital will fill in the spaces), and having important files on flash disks. Please reach out and cross your fingers for me.

On with the quotations:

• “The will to win, the desire to succeed, the urge to reach your full potential... these are the keys that will unlock the door to personal excellence.” – Confucius, Chinese philosopher
• “You reach a point where you don't work for money.” - Walt Disney, American cartoonist
• “People do not like to think. If one thinks, one must reach conclusions. Conclusions are not always pleasant.” - Helen Keller, American author
• “Have no fear of perfection - you'll never reach it.” - Salvador Dali, Spanish artist
• Your problem is to bridge the gap which exists between where you are now and the goal you intend to reach.” - Earl Nightingale, American entertainer
• “Never quit. It is the easiest cop-out in the world. Set a goal and don't quit until you attain it. When you do attain it, set another goal, and don't quit until you reach it. Never quit.” - Bear Bryant, American coach

And three more that I relate to completely:

• “It's not only children who grow. Parents do too. As much as we watch to see what our children do with their lives, they are watching us to see what we do with ours. I can't tell my children to reach for the sun. All I can do is reach for it, myself.” - Joyce Maynard, American writer
• “It is a paradoxical but profoundly true and important principle of life that the most likely way to reach a goal is to be aiming not at that goal itself but at some more ambitious goal beyond it.” - Arnold J. Toynbee, British historian
• “Do not fear mistakes. You will know failure. Continue to reach out.” - Benjamin Franklin, American statesman

What are you reaching for? It is fine and productive to take small steps and keep on keeping on. I would love to hear from you!

Curious about Destination: Do You Have a Solid One? Ask Yourself What Is It?

Definition of Destination: Purpose for which anything is destined; predetermined end, object, or use; ultimate design. The place set for the end of a journey, or to which something is sent; place or point aimed at.

“All you need is the plan, the road map, and the courage to press on to your destination.” Earl Nightingale, American businessman

I have read and heard from many gurus about the importance of having a destination. We need to know where we are going – where we want to be. I have always felt that the destination is another way to describe a goal or an intention.

However, when I started looking up quotations for this blog, I found that there were quite a few who felt that the journey or going through the process was more important than the destination. I certainly see their reasoning. If the destination is a goal, and while we are on the journey we learn and experience alternative approaches, we may find it makes sense to re-adjust our destination – or is it?

I am going to share some of these different ideas, and let you decide for your own situation. The one suggestion I have for you, though, is to make sure that you are on the journey – not just sitting around trying to decide on a destination.

The journey group quotations:

• “The good life is a process, not a state of being. It is a direction not a destination.” - Carl Rogers, American psychologist
• “Success is a journey, not a destination. The doing is often more important than the outcome.” - Arthur Ashe, American athlete
• “Life to me is a journey - you never know what may be your next destination.” - David Russell, Scottish musician
• “Life's a journey, not a destination.” - Steven Tyler- American musician

The destination group quotations:

• “You will now have a starting place and a destination, and you will be able to determine what it will cost you to get there. You will be going someplace.” - H. Stanley Judd, American author
• “It has never been, and never will be easy work! But the road that is built in hope is more pleasant to the traveler than the road built in despair, even though they both lead to the same destination.” - Marion Zimmer Bradley, American writer
• “By prevailing over all obstacles and distractions, one may unfailingly arrive at his chosen goal or destination.” - Christopher Columbus, Italian explorer
• “I think that my biggest role models are people that have maybe struggled for a while and then finally gotten to their destination.” - Jonathan Brandis, American actor
• “Follow what you are genuinely passionate about and let that guide you to your destination.” - Diane Sawyer, American journalist
• “The capacity for hope is the most significant fact of life. It provides human beings with a sense of destination and the energy to get started.” - Norman Cousins, American editor

And two with a combined twist:

“The road leading to a goal does not separate you from the destination; it is essentially a part of it.” - Charles de Lint, Canadian writer

“If we are always arriving and departing, it is also true that we are eternally anchored. One's destination is never a place but rather a new way of looking at things.” - Henry Miller, American author

So, I ask you. Do you have a destination and know where you are going or as Zig Ziglar asks, “Are you a wandering generality?” Send me your feedback.

Curious about Abundance: Do You Believe that We All Have Abundance? What Signifies It?

Definition of Abundance : An overflowing fullness; ample sufficiency; great plenty; profusion; copious supply; superfluity; wealth: -- strictly applicable to quantity only, but sometimes used of number.

“The world is full of abundance and opportunity, but far too many people come to the fountain of life with a sieve instead of a tank car... a teaspoon instead of a steam shovel. They expect little and as a result they get little.” - Ben Sweetland, American author

Yes, we are experiencing a Recession. And, yes, many of us have had to cut back on our spending – I know, I’ve been there, too. Even my favorite radio station, NPR, that usually highlights the positive news has been interviewing people who are out of work or have experienced foreclosure. I am listening to inspirational, positive tapes and CDs instead.

Maybe to some it’s a sign of avoidance and denial, but I fear that it is so much easier to focus on lack – recession or no recession - rather than on abundance.

“When you have too much month for you paycheck, then what you need to do is realize that there is abundance all around you and focus on the abundance and not your lack and as night follows day abundance will come to you.” - Sydney Madwed, American businessman

When I started looking up “abundance” quotations – and they aren’t necessarily current – I found fewer than 3 ½ pages. Out of interest, I looked up “lack” and found 14 pages. That is an incredible difference. That’s why I decided to make this blog positive and encouraging. If you are not looking for positivity, this blog is not for you.

Here are some quotations to help influence and take to heart:

• “Whatever we are waiting for - peace of mind, contentment, grace, the inner awareness of simple abundance - it will surely come to us, but only when we are ready to receive it with an open and grateful heart.” - Sarah Ban Breathnach, American author
• “Many a man curses the rain that falls upon his head, and knows not that it brings abundance to drive away the hunger.” - Saint Basil, Greek saint
• “I noted that people are happy here in India. When I went back home, people had everything in the materialistic sense and were surrounded with abundance, but they were not happy.” - Goldie Hawn, American actress
• “What is called genius is the abundance of life and health.” - Henry David Thoreau, American author
• “Not what we have, but what we enjoy, constitutes our abundance.” – Epicurus, Greek philosopher
• “Expect your every need to be met. Expect the answer to every problem, expect abundance on every level.” - Eileen Caddy, English celebrity

And, two more for us to remember, use, and chew upon:

“Your most precious, valued possessions and your greatest powers are invisible and intangible. No one can take them. You, and you alone, can give them. You will receive abundance for your giving.” - W. Clement Stone, American businessman

“Doing what you love is the cornerstone of having abundance in your life.” - Wayne Dyer, American psychologist

I would love to hear about the abundance in your life. Drop me a comment, and do have a terrific, abundant week!

Curious about Diet: Is Your Lifestyle Diet Working as a Healthy Habit or Is It Making Your Real Age Older?

Definition of Diet: Course of living or nourishment; what is eaten and drunk habitually; food; victuals; fare. A course of food selected with reference to a particular state of health; prescribed allowance of food; regimen prescribed. To cause to eat and drink sparingly, or by prescribed rules; to regulate medicinally the food of. To eat according to prescribed rules; to eat sparingly; as, the doctor says he must diet.

“I certainly feel that the time is not far distant when a knowledge of the principles of diet will be an essential part of one's education. Then mankind will eat to live, be able to do better mental and physical work and disease will be less frequent.” - Fannie Farmer (1857-1915), American celebrity

Well, Fannie Farmer missed the mark, didn’t she? Obesity in our country is so prevalent that every year many new diets and diet books are introduced. However, we and our children are in serious lifestyle modes that are robbing us of healthy living.

In the fitness classes I teach and lead, I experience students who exercise hard, but must be eating many more calories than they need. They are getting heavier by the day. They see that I am slim and say to me, “You don’t have to worry. You are naturally skinny.” Not so. I not only exercise daily, I watch carefully what I eat and don’t eat.

I was lucky to have a mother whose mantra was, “We are what we eat.” She prepared lots of vegetables and fruit dishes – no fried foods or foods laden with gravy or rich sauces. Yes, on special occasions, she baked the best pies I have ever tasted. We never had chips or soda pop in the house and ice cream only once in awhile.

My first year in college, I started gaining weight from eating the starchy foods and hitting the snack bar regularly. And, fortunately, I woke up and started to watch what I ate. I learned it is not always easy to control one’s eating, so I know how hard it can be. I also know how wonderful and energetic I feel. It is worth it.

Of course, I found many, many excellent quotations that I hope will encourage you and your healthy eating habits:

• “And I believe that the best buy in public health today must be a combination of regular physical exercise and a healthy diet.”- Julie Bishop, Australian politician
• “Hope is a very thin diet.” - Thomas Shadwell, English dramatist
• “I always recommend a sensible diet, including lots of carbohydrates and avoiding too much fat. Dancers don't need different fuel from other people - they just need more of it because they use more energy.” - Deborah Bull, British dancer
• “I am now in that happy comfortable state that I do not hesitate to indulge in any fancy in regard to diet, but watch the consequences, and do not continue any course which adds to weight or bulk and consequent discomfort.” - William Banting, English celebrity
• “Look at the average American diet: ice cream, butter, cheese, whole milk, all this fat. People don't realize how much of this stuff you get by the end of the day. High blood pressure is from all this high-fat eating .” - Jack LaLanne, American athlete
• “What some call health, if purchased by perpetual anxiety about diet, isn't much better than tedious disease.” - Alexander Pope, English poet

And, I have to share a few with a twist of humor:

• “Vegetables are a must on a diet. I suggest carrot cake, zucchini bread, and pumpkin pie.” - Jim Davis, American cartoonist
• “In the course of my life, I have often had to eat my words, and I must confess that I have always found it a wholesome diet.” - Winston Churchill, British statesman
• “I told my doctor I get very tired when I go on a diet, so he gave me pep pills. Know what happened? I ate faster.” - Joe E. Lewis, American comedian and singer
• “The second day of a diet is always easier than the first. By the second day you're off it.” - Jackie Gleason, American actor

And a couple to remember and use:

“The circuit training program along with a healthy clean diet is the way to excellent results.” - Lee Haney, American athlete

“My diet is mostly chicken and fish. I make sure I get a lot of vegetables, a lot of fruit. I am a big fruit man, I am a vegetable man anyway. And I also get a lot of rest. That's the key I may be up early, but I'm in bed early too.” - Magic Johnson, American athlete

So, there you have it. Take your time and persevere. You will be glad you did!

Curious about Adversity: Is It True that It Will Make Us Stronger? How Do You Handle It?

“Your greatest successes almost invariably come one step beyond your greatest failures, when everything inside you says quit. Think of failures in terms of how you can make them successes.”- Brian Tracy, American writer

Herodotus, the Greek philosopher, said, “Adversity has the effect of drawing out strength and qualities of a man that would have lain dormant in its absence.”

If you are paying attention to newspapers, radio, TV, and the people you know and love, you are aware that we are facing more adversity than usual. That could be considered negative news, but I have good news for you. Adversity is a gift that can and will turn your life around if you embrace it and derive the many benefits it offers.

Yes, benefits! Here are a few:

• “Every adversity, every failure, every heartache carries with it the seed on an equal or greater benefit.” - Napoleon Hill, American writer and businessman
• “Adversity causes some men to break; others to break records.” - William A. Ward, American educator
• “There is no better than adversity. Every defeat, every heartbreak, every loss, contains its own seed, its own lesson on how to improve your performance the next time.”- Malcolm X, American activist
• “There is no education like adversity.” - Benjamin Disraeli, British statesman
• “Sometimes adversity is what you need to face in order to become successful.” - Zig Ziglar, American motivator and writer
• “Every great man, every successful man, no matter what the field of endeavor, has known the magic that lies in these words: every adversity has the seed of an equivalent or greater benefit.” W. Clement Stone, American businessman

Just like so many others experienced, this year brought me more of life’s adversity than I usually encounter. Sometimes I felt as though I was being tested. My business suffered cash flow challenges, my car was stolen twice, and my computer and computer programs decided it was time to see how much technical adversity I could handle and overcome.

I found many suggestions for dealing with adversity in the quotations I found:

• “In times of great stress or adversity, it's always best to keep busy, to plow your anger and your energy into something positive.” - Lee Iacocca, American businessman
• “Three hundred years ago a prisoner condemned to the Tower of London carved on the wall of his cell this sentiment to keep up his spirits during his long imprisonment: 'It is not adversity that kills, but the impatience with which we bear adversity.’” - James Keller, British writer
• “You'll never find a better sparring partner than adversity.” - Golda Meir, Israeli leader
• “I contend that not only can you laugh at adversity, but it is essential to do so if you are to deal with setbacks without defeat.” - Allen Klein, American businessman
• “In every adversity there lies the seed of an equivalent advantage. In every defeat is a lesson showing you how to win the victory next time.” - Robert Collier, American businessman
• “Fresh activity is the only means of overcoming adversity.” - Johann Wolfgang von Goethe, German poet

And two gems that I want you to take with you:

“Adversity is the diamond dust Heaven polishes its jewels with.” - Thomas Carlyle, Scottish philosopher

“Show me someone who has done something worthwhile, and I'll show you someone who has overcome adversity.” - Lou Holtz, American coach

I challenge you to welcome any adversity with open arms. Do let me know how it has changed you and made you stronger. I know that’s what it has done for me.

Curious about Strength: What Is Your Strongest? How Is It Serving You?

Definition of Strength:The quality or state of being strong; ability to do or to bear; capacity for exertion or endurance, whether physical, intellectual, or moral; force; vigor; power; as, strength of body or of the arm; strength of mind, of memory, or of judgment. That quality which tends to secure results; effective power in an institution or enactment; security; validity; legal or moral force; logical conclusiveness; as, the strength of social or legal obligations; the strength of law; the strength of public opinion; strength of evidence; strength of argument.

“Only one who devotes himself to a cause with his whole strength and soul can be a true master. For this reason mastery demands all of a person.” - Albert Einstein, German physicist

“Strength and growth come only through continuous effort and struggle.” - Napoleon Hill, American writer

I chose strength for this week’s theme – even though I have written about it before – because one of my readers and I were discussing the Strengths Finder test. The premise of the first book, Now Discover Your Strengths, and the follow-up, Strength Finder 2.0, is that we so often spend time and tears on working to overcome our weaknesses, that we don’t make use of our strengths.

From the book: “Unfortunately, most of us have little sense of our talents and strengths, much less the ability to build our lives around them. Instead, . . . we become experts in our weaknesses and spend our lives trying to repair these flaws, while our strengths lie dormant and neglected.”

By knowing our strengths, we can work to make them even stronger. Usually, we are happier and more passionate about our careers and our lives when we are using our strengths and talents. We enjoy doing what we are good at. The quotations I found – and there were plenty – can also serve as lessons in this area. I feel that you will learn lots from them too.

Let’s start with some of my favorites:

• “Wondrous is the strength of cheerfulness, and its power of endurance - the cheerful man will do more in the same time, will do it; better, will preserve it longer, than the sad or sullen.” - Thomas Carlyle, Scottish philosopher
• “It does not take much strength to do things, but it requires great strength to decide on what to do.” - Elbert Hubbard, American writer
• “Our passion is our strength.” - Billie Joe Armstrong, American musician
• “Every great dream begins with a dreamer. Always remember, you have within you the strength, the patience, and the passion to reach for the stars to change the world.” - Harriet Tubman, American activist
• “Good actions give strength to ourselves and inspire good actions in others.” – Plato, Greek philosopher
• “My greatest strength is common sense. I'm really a standard brand - like Campbell's tomato soup or Baker's chocolate.” - Katharine Hepburn, American actress

And a couple more to take with you:

“Only by contending with challenges that seem to be beyond your strength to handle at the moment you can grow more surely toward the stars.” - Brian Tracy, American author

“Strength does not come from physical capacity. It comes from an indomitable will.” - Mohandas Gandhi, Indian leader

What are your strengths? What is the strongest? And, how are you using it?

Curious about Being and/or Becoming an Expert

Definition of Expert: Taught by use, practice, or experience, experienced; having facility of operation or performance from practice; knowing and ready from much practice; clever; skillful; as, an expert surgeon; expert in chess or archery. An expert or experienced person; one instructed by experience; one who has skill, experience, or extensive knowledge in his calling or in any special branch of learning.

“Try, try, try, and keep on trying is the rule that must be followed to become an expert in anything.” - W. Clement Stone, American businessman

“Who's to say who's an expert?” - Paul Newman, American Actor

In what area and/or areas do you possess expertise? You may have a hobby, interest or activity that you are passionate about. Whatever it is, Internet gurus are suggesting that you start writing articles, get involved on forums and even create information products so that you become known as an expert in that field. You may also become more of an expert by doing research, reading and attending workshops and seminars.

Why would you pursue this?

One of the most successful areas in sales online and even offline are information products. These products share how tos and facts that others are searching for. For example, you may be interested in public speaking, fitness, storytelling and web design. I have reasonably priced information products and even free articles that I have written addressing each of these areas that I am passionate about.

Let me share some of the interesting quotations I found for the word expert:

• “What's an expert? I read somewhere, that the more a man knows, the more he knows, he doesn't know. So I suppose one definition of an expert would be someone who doesn't admit out loud that he knows enough about a subject to know he doesn't really know how much.” - Malcolm Forbes, American publisher
• “Never become so much of an expert that you stop gaining expertise. View life as a continuous learning experience.” - Denis Waitley, American writer
• “Make three correct guesses consecutively and you will establish a reputation as an expert.” - Laurence J. Peter, Canadian writer
• “An expert is a man who has made all the mistakes which can be made, in a narrow field.” - Niels Bohr, Danish physicist
• “A leader must have the courage to act against an expert's advice.” - James Callaghan, English leader
• “I'm not an expert, but I want to be.” - Ben Nicholson, British artist

And, a couple more for you to consider:

“Observe, record, tabulate, communicate. Use your five senses. Learn to see, learn to hear, learn to feel, learn to smell, and know that by practice alone you can become expert.” - William Osler, Canadian scientist

“If an expert says it can't be done, get another expert.” - David Ben-Gurion, Israeli statesman

I challenge you to think about having expert status and pursuing information marketing in that field. You will be glad you did.

Curious about Energy: How Much Do You Have? How Do You Get More and/or Maintain It?

“The higher your energy level, the more efficient your body the better you feel and the more you will use your talent to produce outstanding results.” - Tony Robbins, American author

“There is a vitality, a life force, an energy, a quickening, that is translated through you into action, and because there is only one of you in all time, this expression is unique.” - Martha Graham, American dancer

A lot of writers about business and entrepreneurship are extolling the virtues of energy – having it, using it, and maintaining it.

I count myself as being one of the lucky ones. I have always had lots of energy. I especially relate to the following statement by the British athlete Roger Bannister, the first to break the four minute mile, “I was always a great bundle of energy. As a child, instead of walking, I would run. And so running, which is a pain to a lot of people, was always a pleasure to me because it was so easy.”

After he broke it, many more did the same, even in that first following year. And, yes, from his statement, some could say that it was a natural for him. It certainly helped that he enjoyed running and felt that it was “so easy.” I feel, however, that a good part of our level of energy not only comes from enjoying what we do and our mindset, but also from what we eat and the shape in which we keep our bodies.

Our family mantra – repeated over and over again by my mother – was, “We are what we eat.” The American actress, Marilu Henner, sums it up, ““Foods high in bad fats, sugar and chemicals are directly linked to many negative emotions, whereas whole, natural foods rich in nutrients - foods such as fruits, vegetables, grains and legumes - contribute to greater energy and positive emotions.”

I teach eleven group fitness classes a week, seven of which are to seniors 65 and older. It is obvious that those who enjoy life, eat sensibly and give the exercise their all, enjoy an abundance of energy.

When I checked out the quotations about energy, I was sure that the majority would address environmental energy and/or energy sources. I was delighted to find a large number that were concerned with our own energy. Here are a few:

• “Passion is energy. Feel the power that comes from focusing on what excites you.” - Oprah Winfrey, American entertainer
• “Enthusiasm is the energy and force that builds literal momentum of the human soul and mind.” - Bryant H. McGill, American poet
• “Many people worry so much about managing their careers, but rarely spend half that much energy managing their LIVES. I want to make my life, not just my job, the best it can be. The rest will work itself out.” - Reese Witherspoon, American actress
• “We weren't put here to be miserable. We were put here to do the best we can, and we should take our energy and improve our state of being.” - Lenny Kravitz, American musician
• “In times of great stress or adversity, it's always best to keep busy, to plow your anger and your energy into something positive.” - Lee Iacocca, American businessman
• “When you are in the valley, keep your goal firmly in view and you will get the renewed energy to continue the climb.” - Denis Waitley, American writer

And three more to think about during this coming week:

• “The average person puts only 25% of his energy and ability into his work. The world takes off its hat to those who put in more than 50% of their capacity, and stands on its head for those few and far between souls who devote 100%.” - Andrew Carnegie, American businessman
• “Just as your car runs more smoothly and requires less energy to go faster and farther when the wheels are in perfect alignment, you perform better when your thoughts, feelings, emotions, goals, and values are in balance.” - Brian Tracy, American writer
• “Energy and persistence conquer all things.” - Benjamin Franklin, American statesman

So, how much energy do you have? I suggest you make a list – you know how I like lists – of those factors that give you energy. And also a list of those that take or sap your energy. Just being aware will provide the clarity of what you need to change or even do more of.

Curious about Potential: We All Have Plenty. So Why Are We Not Using Our Full Potential?

Definition of Potential: Being potent; endowed with energy adequate to a result; efficacious; influential. Existing in possibility, not in actuality. Anything that may be possible; a possibility; potentially.

“We can reach our potential, but to do so, we must reach within ourselves. We must summon the strength, the will, and the faith to move forward - to be bold - to invest in our future.” - John Hoeven, American politician

If we’ve heard it once, we have heard it over and over again. Few of us ever use our whole – or even a good amount of our potential. I started thinking about this yesterday while and after watching a terrific video starring my favorite inspirational mentor, Tony Robbins, and two of the best Internet marketers – Frank Kern and John Reese.

Kern and Reese were asking Tony why it is that so many purchasers of programs and/or attendees to pricey seminars never get started using the material. Robbins explained it this way with four boxes – two on top and two below. The first in the upper left was our potential. We all have lots. The second box in the upper right has the actions we take – usually weak because of fears of failure and making fools of ourselves. On the bottom right is the results box. These are weak because of the lack of strong actions. This box points to the bottom left box which holds our beliefs.

And, of course, the weak results just enforce the belief that we can’t succeed, leading back up to our potential. Now, we question our potential. And the vicious cycle has begun even though we all have the potential we need. As Robbins points out, we must realize and believe that it takes guts to succeed. Plus, we must have the certainty that we can and will do what it takes. We do have the requisite potential.

As you can imagine, there were many, many quotations about potential. Let’s share a few:

• “Too often we underestimate the power of a touch, a smile, a kind word, a listening ear, an honest compliment, or the smallest act of caring, all of which have the potential to turn a life around.” -Leo Buscaglia, American author
• “Every day, people settle for less than they deserve. They are only partially living or at best living a partial life. Every human being has the potential for greatness.” - Bo Bennett, American businessman
• “I am here for a purpose and that purpose is to grow into a mountain, not to shrink to a grain of sand. Henceforth will I apply ALL my efforts to become the highest mountain of all and I will strain my potential until it cries for mercy.” - Og Mandino, American writer
• “If you had to identify, in one word, the reason why the human race has not achieved, and never will achieve, its full potential, that word would be 'meetings.'” - Dave Barry, American journalist
• “In all realms of life it takes courage to stretch your limits, express your power, and fulfill your potential... it's no different in the financial realm.” - Suze Orman, American author
• “Continuous effort - not strength or intelligence - is the key to unlocking our potential.” - Winston Churchill, English statesman

And a couple more to consider:

“The number one benefit of information technology is that it empowers people to do what they want to do. It lets people be creative. It lets people be productive. It lets people learn things they didn't think they could learn before, and so in a sense it is all about potential.” - Steve Ballmer, American businessman

“We need to steer clear of this poverty of ambition, where people want to drive fancy cars and wear nice clothes and live in nice apartments but don't want to work hard to accomplish these things. Everyone should try to realize their full potential.” - Barack Obama, American President

So, will you start using more of your potential? I know that I will!

Curious about Expression: So Many Different Types and Means of Expression. How Well Do You and I Express Ourselves and Our Ideas?

Definition of Expression : The act of declaring or signifying; declaration; utterance; as, an expression of the public will. (2) Lively or vivid representation of meaning, sentiment, or feeling, etc.; significant and impressive indication, whether by language, appearance, or gesture; that manner or style which gives life and suggestive force to ideas and sentiments; as, he reads with expression; her performance on the piano has expression. (3) That which is expressed by a countenance, a posture, a work of art, etc.; look, as indicative of thought or feeling.

“Freedom of expression is the matrix, the indispensable condition, of nearly every other form of freedom.” - Benjamin Cardozo, American judge

“There is a vitality, a life force, an energy, a quickening, that is translated through you into action, and because there is only one of you in all time, this expression is unique.” - Martha Graham, American dancer

I chose “Expression” for this week’s theme, because in all of my careers, I am noticing my various means of expressing thoughts, feelings, ideas, emotions, beliefs, and much, much more. I have also noticed the expressions of the people I come in contact with – students, friends, family members, Internet contacts, club members, strangers, those I meet through networking, and again, many, many more.

And, there are also the non-verbal expressions of my surroundings. The apartment that I live in which exhibits a good amount of my artwork, the modern furnishings that I love, the prints on the walls that express the work of my favorite artists, the colors that speak to me, and more. I have a small garden which not only expresses my love of flowers, it shows that I grow and enjoy vegetables – especially tomatoes.

I notice too, that when we speak and/or write words, what we are trying to express can easily be misinterpreted by the receivers. There is a fine line between enthusiasm and pushiness, between subtle marketing and over zealous selling.

I urge you to consider the reactions you receive from others. Are they smiling because they are experiencing your smiling expression. Or did something you said made them angry or confused?

When I searched for useful quotations using expression, I found 14 pages, each holding at least 20 great quotations. Many referred to “freedom of expression,” others to art and performance. Let’s consider a few:

• “A picture is the expression of an impression. If the beautiful were not in us, how would we ever recognize it?” - Ernst Haas, Austrian photographer
• “I wish I had invented blue jeans. They have expression, modesty, sex appeal, simplicity - all I hope for in my clothes.” - Yves Saint Laurent, French designer
• “A woman whose smile is open and whose expression is glad has a kind of beauty no matter what she wears.” - Anne Roiphe, American author
• “If we don't believe in freedom of expression for people we despise, we don't believe in it at all.” - Noam Chomsky, American activist
• “Success in any endeavor depends on the degree to which it is an expression of your true self.” - Ralph S. Marston, Jr., American motivator
• “Feelings or emotions are the universal language and are to be honored. They are the authentic expression of who you are at your deepest place.” - Judith Wright, Australian poet

And a couple more to chew upon:

“A man of genius has a right to any mode of expression.” - Ezra Pound, American poet

“Young players need freedom of expression to develop as creative players... they should be encouraged to try skills without fear of failure.” - Arsene Wenger, French coach

I feel that we all should be encouraged to try skills without fear of failure. How is your expression skill? How about updating it? Let me know how it works for you.

Curious about Rejection: How Do You Deal with It? What’s Good about It?

“A rejection is nothing more than a necessary step in the pursuit of success.” - Bo Bennett, American businessman

“Don't let anyone, or any rejection, keep you from what you want.” - Ashley Tisdale, American actress

You may be wondering why I picked rejection - such a negative word for this week’s theme. I ask you, though, whether it really is so negative? I have been listening to many audio tapes lately. Several deal with writing, others with speaking and presenting, and several with sales and selling.

As you can imagine they all mention rejection. They don’t downplay the importance of experiencing rejection – everyone does experience it. It is how we react that is the important and lasting part.

As the American author James Lee Burke says, “There's nothing like rejection to make you do an inventory of yourself.”

All well known writers usually share that they have had enough rejection slips to wallpaper a large room. Many times meeting planners are choosing between several speakers. Just because you are one of the rejected speakers doesn’t mean that you are lacking. It just means that you might not fit as well with that audience. Storytelling festival planners face the same challenges and excellent storytellers are not always the first choice. And, finally, in the field of selling, I would wager to say that more potential sales people drop out because of the fear of and dislike for rejection.

I submit to you that rejection can be viewed as character building, a learning experience, and clarification of a situation. You and I have interviewed for jobs and not gotten them. I have met with potential clients and proposed websites that haven’t been chosen. And, if like me, you have been involved with network and/or multi-level marketing, you know that the rejection can be brutal.

It is not easy, but accepting rejection is like falling off a horse. You just get back up, dust yourself off, and get back on the horse.

How about some more quotations from the experts:

• “Through my illness I learned rejection. I was written off. That was the moment I thought, Okay, game on. No prisoners. Everybody's going down.” - Lance Armstrong, American athlete
• “Retirement may be looked upon either as a prolonged holiday or as a rejection, a being thrown on to the scrap-heap.” - Simone de Beauvoir, French writer
• “Some actors couldn't figure out how to withstand the constant rejection. They couldn't see the light at the end of the tunnel.” - Harrison Ford, American actor
• “I wrote poems in my corner of the Brooks Street station. I sent them to two editors who rejected them right off. I read those letters of rejection years later and I agreed with those editors.” - Carl Sandburg, American poet
• “It was the worst period of my life. I had all this gigantic acceptance as a kid, and all of a sudden there was this monumental rejection.” - Tommy Rettig, American actor“
• I had immediate success in the sense that I sold something right off the bat. I thought it was going to be a piece of cake and it really wasn't. I have drawers full of - or I did have - drawers full of rejection slips.” - Fred Saberhagen, American author

A couple more to chew upon during these coming weeks – that is, if you experience any rejection:

“I really wish I was less of a thinking man and more of a fool not afraid of rejection.” - Billy Joel, American musician

“I take rejection as someone blowing a bugle in my ear to wake me up and get going, rather than retreat.” - Sylvester Stallone, American actor

What kind of rejection have you dealt with? What was good about it? And what was bad? I would love to hear from you.

Curious about Superstition: Yes, We All Have Them. What Are Yours?

Definition of Superstition: An excessive reverence for, or fear of, that which is unknown or mysterious. Belief in the direct agency of superior powers in certain extraordinary or singular events, or in magic, omens, prognostics, or the like.

“Superstition is foolish, childish, primitive and irrational - but how much does it cost you to knock on wood?” - Judith Viorst, American author

“Although I myself don't go to church or synagogue, I do, whether it's superstition or whatever, pray every time I get on a plane. I just automatically do it. I say the same thing every time.” Barbara Walters, American journalist

I don’t know how you feel about superstition, but I do feel that whether or not we admit it, most of us would agree with Judith Viorst.

On Friday, I posted my suggestion using a traditional superstition for the first day of the month. This had been shared with me a while back by one of my favorite storytellers, Kathryn Windham, who comes from Selma, Alabama. She said that before you get out of bed on the first day of the month, you should yell out, “Rabbit, Rabbit.” This will bring you good luck for the whole month. My Facebook friends’ reactions were varied, and several thought I was a bit crazy.

So, for this blog, I thought it would be fun to investigate superstition. I was surprised by the strong feelings when I searched the quotations. There were quite a few that mentioned religion and others that linked it to ignorance and even to fear.

“A belief which leaves no place for doubt is not a belief; it is a superstition.” - Jose Bergamin, Spanish writer – is that true?

“You'll find superstition a contagious thing. Some people let it get the better of them.” - Curt Siodmak, German novelist

As I started to consider my own superstitions, and I am not what most would call a “superstitious person,” I realized that Bergamin might not call a lot of my beliefs superstitions, but I am close. I believe in the power of Feng Shui – I do have a goldfish in my wealth area. And I agree with the American actor, Gil Gerard, “I have a superstition about saying too much about what I want to happen, just in case it all disappears, or someone else comes along and beats me to it.”

Here are a few of the many interesting quotations I found:

• “There is a fifth dimension, beyond that which is known to man. It is a dimension as vast as space and as timeless as infinity. It is the middle ground between light and shadow, between science and superstition.” - Rod Serling, American writer
• “I had only one superstition. I made sure to touch all the bases when I hit a home run.” - Babe Ruth, American athlete
• “The only foes that threaten America are the enemies at home, and these are ignorance, superstition and incompetence.” - Elbert Hubbard, American writer
• “Superstition is the poetry of life.” - Johann Wolfgang von Goethe, German poet
• “I'm a third done into a new book but sorry - I have a superstition about talking about it!” - Joanna Trollope, English novelist
• “Conscience without judgment is superstition.” - Benjamin Whichcote, British philosopher

As we learn more and more about our world, our brains, and our beliefs, I urge you to remember the following quotation:

“Superstition? Who can define the boundary line between the superstition of yesterday and the scientific fact of tomorrow?” - Garrett Fort, American writer

And I wonder if you my readers have superstitions. It would be fun to share a few. Let me hear from you.

Curious about Compassion: How Many of Us Have It? Lessons I Have Learned along the Way.

Definition of Compassion : Literally, suffering with another; a sensation of sorrow excited by the distress or misfortunes of another; commiseration.

“If you want others to be happy, practice compassion. If you want to be happy, practice compassion. Whether one believes in a religion or not, and whether one believes in rebirth or not, there isn't anyone who doesn't appreciate kindness and compassion.” - Dalai Lama, Tibetan leader

“Compassion is sometimes the fatal capacity for feeling what it is like to live inside somebody else's skin. It is the knowledge that there can never really be any peace and joy for me until there is peace and joy finally for you too.” – Frederick Buechner, American clergyman

I chose compassion for this week’s theme, because I feel that our levels of compassion during this economic downturn, are being tested continually. Young and old alike are feeling the money crunch. Many are losing jobs, homes, money – and even worse – hope.

There are some of us who so easily slipped into heavy debt and are now suffering the consequences.

Yes, gurus tell us that this is a time of great opportunity. And, yes, those who have wealthy abundance are snapping up properties that are in foreclosure. And, others are even benefitting from the incredible retail sales offered by businesses that are closing and/or struggling.

How is your compassion level on a scale of 1 to 10?

Let me tell you my story of compassion. Being a fitness instructor and a sensible, healthy eater, I have had almost non-existent health challenges over the years – not quite to the level of smugness, but close. Participants in my fitness classes have often asked for advice on their aches, pains, and extra weight. I must admit that, if I watched them under performing in class, I didn’t have a great deal of compassion. Also, when I suggested that they cut back their fat intake, I would even experience disdain when they would say, “But I love to eat. I love food!”

All that until four and a half years ago.

I had a freak fall at the health club where I teach. I didn’t even have any compassion for myself. I got up, taught three classes, did visit the Emergency Room, and felt that I could get rid of the pain on my own. Three weeks passed with me walking with mounting pain and difficulty until I returned to the hospital, was re-x-rayed and found that I had a fractured hip. After surgery, I was not allowed to put any weight on it. No driving, no fitness classes, no usual active schedule.

I learned compassion for everyone who is disabled in any way. Also, for those with chronic pain of any kind. In the grocery store, I would drive around in one of those special carts. Fortunately, I could stand on my left leg and reach the top shelves, but those people who can’t stand, can’t reach them or most of the shelves. Even at the clinic where doors to the rest rooms are wide enough for a wheelchair, they are so heavy, they are impossible to open without help.

As you can imagine, I found a plethora of compassion quotations. Here are a few:

• “Martin Luther King, Jr. Day is a time to honor the greatest champion of racial equality who taught a nation - through compassion and courage - about democracy, nonviolence and racial justice.” - Mark Pryor, American politician
• “The dew of compassion is a tear.” – Lord Byron, British poet
• “The individual is capable of both great compassion and great indifference. He has it within his means to nourish the former and outgrow the latter.” – Norman Cousins, American editor
• “The purpose of human life is to serve, and to show compassion and the will to help others.” - Albert Schweitzer, German theologian
• “Yoga is about compassion and generosity towards others. It means being mindful of the world around us.” - Christy Turlington, American model
• “Wisdom, compassion, and courage are the three universally recognized moral qualities of men.” – Confucius, Chinese philosopher

And a couple more to think about:

“Computers are magnificent tools for the realization of our dreams, but no machine can replace the human spark of spirit, compassion, love, and understanding.” - Louis Gerstner, American businessman

I feel a lot like the American director, Martin Scorsese who said, “And as I've gotten older, I've had more of a tendency to look for people who live by kindness, tolerance, compassion, a gentler way of looking at things.”

How about you?