Curious about What Makes a Seminar Superlative?

Let me set the scene. In February a man I had been learning from for years, but only knew through the Internet, was finally coming to Cleveland to give his Internet Marketing Briefing. I signed up immediately (and was actually the first person on his list) and looked forward to April 28th when Dr. Ralph Wilson would be here in person.

Little did I know that I would be moving on April 27th. Preparation for this first move in eleven years, along with keeping up with my own “Portfolio Career,” made me feel like I had walked to California and back. Still, there was no way that I would give up attending the seminar – and, am I glad that I attended.

It was in a category that I rarely experience – it was superlative! Wilson had us enthralled for close to seven hours, and as worn out as I was from my grueling move, I never felt the least bit sleepy.

What made the seminar so superlative?

First of all, Wilson has been there and done it all. He has been involved with Internet Marketing since the early 90s. He started on a shoestring, tried everything and keeps trying because, as we all know, the Internet changes daily. Wilson is not only a success, filled with wisdom and knowledge, passionate about what he does, but he is also willing to share it all.

He has a delightful personality that shines through his whole presentation. He is willing to answer questions, yet keeps enough control over time, that the seminar never dragged. If we had a five minute break, it lasted only five minutes.

He interjects humor and interaction throughout. And, during the breaks, he was always willing to answer the more technical questions that some of us had.

One of the techniques that amazed me was Wilson’s use of PowerPoint. I generally hate it, because so many presenters depend upon the slides to give the talk. They read them – often with their backs to the participants – and drone on and on.

Wilson provided us with handouts that mirrored the slides, so he did not take much time with each. Each slide made one and only one point, and in addition to the few words shown, each had a meaningful, and often fun and funny, graphic. These added extra oomph and interest throughout.

He also treated us with respect – never making anyone feel stupid for asking a question. And, even though he had the ability to explain everything in a basic and straightforward manner, he was never, never boring.

I could go on and on, but will plan to write an article in the future for my Powerful Presentations website about Wilson’s incredible approach. If you would like to learn more about and from Dr. Ralph Wilson, visit his website by clicking HERE.

Curious about Fun: How Much Are You Having?

Theodor Geisel wrote, “Fun is good.” And Katharine Graham wrote, “To love what you do and feel that it matters how could anything be more fun?”

Many years ago while attending a National Speakers Association Convention, I listened to a professional speaker (I can’t even remember his name now) berate those who encouraged happiness and fun. To paraphrase what I do remember, he was warning that to be successful we needed to work hard and not focus on seeking happiness and fun. After all, work was work and hard work, too!

I didn’t agree with him then, and now I even disagree more with his opinion and advice.

Yes, there are those who roll their eyes and scoff when I tell them that the work we do should be so much fun that it seems more like play. I submit to you that if you are not having fun, you should heartily reconsider what kind of work you are doing.

For ammunition, I visited my favorite site for quotes (www.brainyquote.com) and found more quotes for “fun” than I usually find for other words. Because these well known and successful people have summed up the subject so succinctly, I want to share some of them with you:

• "I never did a day's work in my life. It was all fun.” - Thomas A. Edison
• “People rarely succeed unless they have fun in what they are doing.” - Dale Carnegie
• “Work is much more fun than fun.” - Noel Coward
• “I'm picking and choosing in terms of the stress factor. If it's not fun, I'm not going to do it.” - Anita Baker
• “The man who does not work for the love of work but only for money is not likely to make money nor find much fun in life.” - Charles Schwab
• “I've had smarter people around me all my life, but I haven't run into one yet that can outwork me. And if they can't outwork you, then smarts aren't going to do them much good. That's just the way it is. And if you believe that and live by it, you'd be surprised at how much fun you can have.” - Woody Hayes

Of course, I did find many other ideas revolving around fun and I want to share a few more with you along with my comments.

Joe Namath wrote, “When you have confidence, you can have a lot of fun. And when you have fun, you can do amazing things.” I remember his ad long ago where he showed his leg on TV. It certainly took self confidence and it was obvious he was having fun doing it. If you are confident enough to look a little foolish, you will be amazed by the fun you can have!

Vincent Price said, “It's as much fun to scare as to be scared.” And it is, as long as it is done in fun. When I first started telling stories I wasn’t keen about ghost stories. They, and other scary stories, however, are the most popular with all ages. So, I worked on some and have found that I love scaring others. It is fun, and, even though I was never keen about Halloween when my children were young, I love it now. Tellers who have good scary stories are in demand!

And, finally, Franklin P. Adams wrote, “While the work or play is on, it is a lot of fun if while you are doing one you don't constantly feel that you ought to be doing the other.” Hey, Franklin, if you feel that your work is play, you won’t ever have this problem!

So, I ask you, do you love what you do enough to have fun, no matter how hard you are working? Or, do your days drag by? I certainly hope not.

Curious about Jealousy - Is It Really Jealousy?

I have wondered for some time why certain members of a discussion group and/or forum are challenged - in a rather combative way - by others in the group. Is it jealousy or the desire to give someone who is obviously self-assured a “come up-pance?”

Summer Altice wrote, “People are taken aback by a confident, pretty girl who knows what she wants in life and isn't going to let anyone get in her way. And you know what it's all about? Jealousy.” We could substitute anyone for the “pretty girl” and Altice sums up the whole idea of why detractors are challenged and moved to take potshots at others.

Often we think of jealousy when we are talking about relationships and love, but it can take on many more personas.

I spent this past weekend at a storyteller’s retreat which was a long drive from my home. On the way, I re-listened to Anne Lamott’s Bird by Bird, Some Instructions on Writing and Life. She includes a whole chapter on Jealousy.

She wrote, “Jealousy is such a direct attack on whatever measure of confidence you’ve been able to muster. But if you continue to write, you are probably going to have to deal with it, because some wonderful, dazzling successes are going to happen for some of the most awful, angry, undeserving writer you know - people who are, in other words, not you.”

Lamott continues writing about another writer who calls often to tell her about the wonderful successes occurring in that writer’s life. In her honest and no-holds-barred style, Lamott admits to her jealousy of and bad feelings for this writer. Her final way of dealing with the situation was to look for the humor, write about it and finally tell her writer friend that she “needed a sabbatical” from their friendship. If you would like to read more about Lamott and her books, click HERE.

One point that she did touch on is that we are brought up in an extremely competitive society, so it is usual to feel some envy for another who is doing better, while we seem to be treading water. And yet, we are always told to be “happy for others” when they succeed or win. After all, we are supposed to always be “good sports.”

I think that the following quotes put interesting spins on jealousy:

• Washington Irving wrote, “There is never jealousy where there is not strong regard.”
• Buzz Aldrin wrote, “I was an outsider. I was the egghead from academia who got in because the rules had changed. While I looked for validation from my fellow contemporaries, I instead found jealousy and envy. I did not find team spirit. This led to dissatisfaction, an unease.”
• Fulton J. Sheen wrote, “Jealousy is the tribute mediocrity pays to genius.”
• And Erica Jong wrote, “Jealousy is all the fun you think they had.”

I tend toward Jong’s light-hearted approach, and yet, after hearing Lamott and reading the various thoughts on jealousy, I started wondering if any jealousy of others or others’ jealousy of me was corroding my thoughts and energy.

What about you? Do you think or feel that jealousy is natural? Is it harmful, or when is it harmful? I would love to read your comments.

Curious about Jealousy - Is It Really Jealousy?

I have wondered for some time why certain members of a discussion group and/or forum are challenged - in a rather combative way - by others in the group. Is it jealousy or the desire to give someone who is obviously self-assured a “come up-pance?”

Summer Altice wrote, “People are taken aback by a confident, pretty girl who knows what she wants in life and isn't going to let anyone get in her way. And you know what it's all about? Jealousy.” We could substitute anyone for the “pretty girl” and Altice sums up the whole idea of why detractors are challenged and moved to take potshots at others.

Often we think of jealousy when we are talking about relationships and love, but it can take on many more personas.

I spent this past weekend at a storyteller’s retreat which was a long drive from my home. On the way, I re-listened to Anne Lamott’s Bird by Bird, Some Instructions on Writing and Life. She includes a whole chapter on Jealousy.

She wrote, “Jealousy is such a direct attack on whatever measure of confidence you’ve been able to muster. But if you continue to write, you are probably going to have to deal with it, because some wonderful, dazzling successes are going to happen for some of the most awful, angry, undeserving writer you know - people who are, in other words, not you.”

Lamott continues writing about another writer who calls often to tell her about the wonderful successes occurring in that writer’s life. In her honest and no-holds-barred style, Lamott admits to her jealousy of and bad feelings for this writer. Her final way of dealing with the situation was to look for the humor, write about it and finally tell her writer friend that she “needed a sabbatical” from their friendship. If you would like to read more about Lamott and her books, click HERE.

One point that she did touch on is that we are brought up in an extremely competitive society, so it is usual to feel some envy for another who is doing better, while we seem to be treading water. And yet, we are always told to be “happy for others” when they succeed or win. After all, we are supposed to always be “good sports.”

I think that the following quotes put interesting spins on jealousy:

• Washington Irving wrote, “There is never jealousy where there is not strong regard.”
• Buzz Aldrin wrote, “I was an outsider. I was the egghead from academia who got in because the rules had changed. While I looked for validation from my fellow contemporaries, I instead found jealousy and envy. I did not find team spirit. This led to dissatisfaction, an unease.”
• Fulton J. Sheen wrote, “Jealousy is the tribute mediocrity pays to genius.”
• And Erica Jong wrote, “Jealousy is all the fun you think they had.”

I tend toward Jong’s light-hearted approach, and yet, after hearing Lamott and reading the various thoughts on jealousy, I started wondering if any jealousy of others or others’ jealousy of me was corroding my thoughts and energy.

What about you? Do you think or feel that jealousy is natural? Is it harmful, or when is it harmful? I would love to read your comments.

Curious about Perfection: Does Perfection Drive You?

On my “Portfolio Career” Self-Test, I include the statement, “I am not driven by perfection.” It is surprising to me how many people who take the test, give this a low score. I did have another test taker wonder how this statement applied to the handling of a “Portfolio Career” (many careers at the same time).

I have learned, and often the hard way, that you do want to be picky and always strive to be the best, but if you never complete anything, because nothing is ever perfect, you are hurting yourself, your work and your business.

Many years ago I purchased an older, two story house in disrepair and hired an accomplished contractor to do the major rehabilitation. I had just finished studio art classes at Kent State in pursuit of an MFA. It had been drummed into me - and also worked for me - that the artist who took the time to do the extra finishing and polishing to a work of art, usually won the prize and distinguished them self and their work from others.

So when I mentioned something not quite right about the finishing of a portion of the house, my contractor looked me straight in the eye and said, “Chris, you have to remember that no one is perfect.” How true!

Gustave Flaubert wrote, “Artists who seek perfection in everything are those who cannot attain it in anything.”

You see, if we wait until everything is perfect, we will always be waiting. I know. I have used up hours and hours of time, trying to tweak the design of a website until it looks exactly the way I want it, only to discover that on a different computer, with a different browser, it doesn’t look at all the way I planned it.

In his timely fashion, one of my favorite motivators, Michael Angier, wrote this about perfection in today’s e-newsletter, “Most projects can be fiddled with, tweaked, polished and revised to the point where they never actually get done. For many people, this can be a way to keep from failing. If the book, thesis or work of art is always in progress, then no one will judge it. What looks like a desire for perfection is often simply fear of failure.” You will find him and a place to sign up for one of the few newsletters I have kept coming into my mailbox at www.successnet.org.

So, let’s ask ourselves, “Are we or are we not driven by perfection? And why or why not?” I do feel that those of us who are willing to put ourselves out there for the world to see and know us, are taking a risk. And we are often pushed, because of this, to try to make everything perfect.

However, I suggest that we heed the words of Debra Messing, “When you're passionate about something, you want it to be all it can be. But in the endgame of life, I fundamentally believe the key to happiness is letting go of that idea of perfection.”

Not easy to do, but, as I learned when under deadline as a newspaper editor, that my readers would have been much more upset to not have a paper than by receiving one that wasn’t completely perfect (mind you, I still tried to make it as “perfect” as I could and still come in under deadline).

Curious about "Chutzpah"

I have been receiving a plethora of results from interesting people taking my Portfolio Career Self Test - or Am I Someone Who Would Love to Have One? It consists of twenty statements to be rated on a scale from 1 to 5, with 1 being “not at all true” to 5 at “very true.”

One of the statements that often results in a low number score from 1 to 3 is, “I have chutzpah.” I included this statement, because I feel that to succeed with a far-from-the-norm type of career (a “Portfolio Career” is having several different careers at the same time) takes “chutzpah.” I also feel that to be able to assertively sell and market ourselves, we need “chutzpah.”

I have discovered that several of the test takers weren’t sure of the meaning of the word “chutzpah.” That started me wondering more about it myself. So, here goes.

From Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia, (you will find it here), “Chutzpah is the quality of audacity, for good or for bad …Though originally referring to a negative quality, the word chutzpah has developed some interesting positive connotations in English usage. Where as in Hebrew chutzpah is used indignantly, to describe someone who has out stepped the boundaries of accepted polite behavior for selfish reasons, in English chutzpah can be spoken in admiration of non-conformist but gutsy audacity.”

A list of synonyms includes: audacity, effrontery, cheekiness, nerve, daring, gutsiness, hubris, gall, arrogance, presumption, pushiness, attitude, ballsiness, gumption, brazenness, and impudence.

And yet, someone else said that none of the above words really describe "chutzpah" fully. Its classic definition, by the way, is “A boy is on trial for murdering his parents, and he begs of the judge leniency because he is an orphan.” Yes, it is a stronger word than I imagined, but I don’t think I’ll revise my test.

In my search for information on “chutzpah” I found an excellent blog with the article, “Women Writers: The Chutzpah Factor” by Cassandra. You can find it by clicking here.

If you are interested in taking the “Portfolio Career Self Test - or Am I Someone Who Would Love to Have One? click here. And have fun! Also, decide if a bit of “chutzpah” would help you. I know it does me.

Curious about “Round-To-Its” - Why Do They and We Procrastinate?

Zig Ziglar is a firm believer in goals and goal setting. He warns us, though, that if we don’t take action on our goals, we are just another “Round-To-It.” “I’ll work on it when I get `round to it.”

As I prepare for my move, I have been sorting through my myriad of books, and realize that, even though I feel that I am disciplined and a goal setter and getter, I have found quite a few good books that I started and never got `round to finishing. What a shame! I have donated many of these to the local library in hopes that someone else will read them through to the end and benefit.

A different scenario with the same “Round-To-It” theme, but a happier outcome for me, concerns my American Council on Exercise (ACE) Certification as a Group Fitness Instructor.

One of the clubs where I teach the majority of my classes has been sending out notices for the past five years that as instructors we must be certified - either through their own certification program or another nationally recognized program.

I started teaching in 1991 and for four years was certified by one fitness group. Once I had made the decision that I wanted to teach fitness, I attended two weekends of classes, passed the test and got my first certification. At that time most clubs did not require certification. I felt that being certified not only gave me credibility but also knowledge that I could put to use in my classes. Both have been true for me.

In 1995, I set a goal to become certified by the top fitness organization, ACE. This involved taking the hardest exam I have ever taken. I purchased the study guides, sample test and the huge book that covered all the necessary material. I mapped out my plan of study - a chapter a week - and spent the whole summer learning everything my brain could remember. The test was so hard, I wasn’t sure I had passed - but I had, and with flying colors.

I did get `round to it, and since then have attended workshops and classes to earn the Continuing Education Credits necessary for renewal of my ACE Certification every two years.

I am telling you this, because last week I received a whiny call from another instructor at the club. You see, the club has finally decided to follow through and suspend those who are not certified. This one, along with quite a few others are “up in arms” about this.

She started right in asking me, “Are you certified?” When I answered, “Yes, with ACE, since 1995,” she asked how I got certified. I explained that I had sent for the study materials, studied and took the exam (it was at least a 2 1/2 hour test). She went on to say that our club was pressuring her to get certified and the time was nearly up. Did I think it was fair?

I was the wrong person to ask that question. I asked her how long she had been teaching - "five years" was her answer - and why she hadn’t worked to become certified before this. She hadn’t gotten `round to finding out how to become certified. Her excuse was that she didn’t know who to ask. And now she was in a bind, because the club wasn’t going to put up with “Round-To-Its” any longer. In her defense, she isn’t the only one. There are many others complaining bitterly.

It made me realize how easy it is to be a “Round-To-It” and prompted me to sit down and write a list of goals that I have already started getting `round to.

So, I challenge you to consider whether or not you have “Round-To-Its” lurking in the background. Expose them, write them down and get `round-to-it! You’ll be glad you did.